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  • 5 Ways to Build Good Character for Yourself

    We all have skeletons in our closets. Some of the skeletons do not make us proud to look at. They remind us of the unpleasant bad past.

    There is no perfect individual on planet earth, non at all. Even the so-called righteous men and women of God have dark skeletons. Some are even, darker than can be imagined.

    However, there is room for all to live a changed life. What you did yesterday should not be allowed to discourage you from living a changed life.

    It should never be used as an excuse for refusing to do better. You can make a difference if you change the way of your life.

    You may not know it but we are role models for someone out there. Someone looks up to you. If you are a father or let me just say a parent, your children look up to you and it is your duty to bring them up in the right manner.

    I have made mistakes in my life, some of which am very embarrassed and ashamed to talk about. But you know what, I am ok with the mistakes because I cannot change them.

    I simply cannot change the past. I can only learn from the mistakes and move on and believe me, I have moved on and never going backwards.

    When I look back from where I’m coming from to where I am today, it can only be God and I am very grateful to him that he has allowed me to live a more decent and changed life.

    He has given me an opportunity for a fresh start. He has allowed me to write a new chapter in my life and I believe that there is a much bigger responsibility he has in stock for me.

    My focus for the remainder of my life is to help change the world for the better.

    Yes, there is so much more to work on, but my life is very different from what it was a few years back. I feel much more in control of myself and my well-being. It feels better to live like this.

    I feel God allows us to experience certain things for a reason. All those late nights I used to spend wasting away my life have helped me to stay late at night doing something constructive.

    You do not have to continue wasting your life away. You too can start living a positive and constructive life. There is room to change for all of us.

    Change the Way You Think

    They say an idle mind is the devil’s workshop. You cannot change your past. The past is nothing but history. However, you can change the course of your future by changing the way you think.

    All meaningful and long-lasting change begins with a changed mindset. If you want to see and experience significant change, start with your mind. Change your mind and begin to live a much more positive and happy life. Start where you are.

    Be the change you would like to see in the world. Stop complaining about things being wrong. Do something about them, fix them for goodness sake.

    Have you noticed that people who do not have much are always complaining about what they do have?

    Start from your home, if something is not being done properly do it yourself rather than complain. If your house is not being cleaned to your standards, clean it yourself.

    All am trying to say is that do something to change the status quo.

    The mind is the factory of what comes out. You are what you think about most of the time. Your mind is capable of creating the right environment for you.

    Change Your Associations

    If you want to see yourself progress, take time to reflect on the kind of associations you have. The relationships we maintain have a huge impact on our lives.

    Relationships that are not handled properly can be a distraction to your personal development.

    The associations you keep have an influence on your life. Start with your friends because they have a bigger influence on your social life. They say birds of the same feather flock together.

    Some of the people we hang around with are not beneficial. They are toxic. Cut of all relationships that have a negative influence on your life.

    You cannot expect meaningful change when you continue going to the club with your old pals if the problem you have is clubbing.

    If you are in a toxic relationship you need to sort that one out. For those that are not married yet, and are in toxic relationships, my advice is to quit the relationship. It is not worth it.

    If you are a girl and have a boyfriend that mistreats you, leave him. Find someone else. He will never change even when he marries you, in fact, chances are that he will be worse.

    Spiritual Growth

    The church is a good place to be. Find a Bible Based Church. You will find God-fearing people that can help you grow. For me, church is about service to the people.

    There is no greater feeling of satisfaction you can get than what you get when you are of service. A good church always encourages its members to be of service. We serve without expectation. We serve because we enjoy serving.

    There are some good folks you can find in church that will help you grow spiritually. You like it or not, spirituality is necessary for complete personal growth and transformation.

    Look, believe it or not, there is a supreme being somewhere. For me, I believe in the gospel of Jesus Christ and have found comfort in the church and reading the bible.

    Spiritual growth has many benefits, one of which is the growth of your faith and the promise of a better life.

    Have Self Control

    Self-control is the ability to restrain yourself from doing something adversely especially when you are emotionally charged.

    Learn to keep your emotions under control. Otherwise, you may end up doing something you will regret for the rest of your life.

    If you find yourself in an emotionally charged argument the best is to keep quiet and keep calm. Better still walk away. It is better to discuss when emotions have settled. That way you will be speaking with a cool head.

    Watch Your Words

    Watch your words and they become life. Be careful with what you say. They say words have life.

    The bible says “he spoke and it came to be.” I know that many of us have been careless with what we say especially when we are annoyed.

    But words truly have life, once spoken; you cannot reverse them. Yes, you may be sorry afterward but the damage would have already been done.

    Words are a direct expression of our feelings and emotions at a particular time.

    Make a decision every morning that you will not curse or swear during the day. That you will not be slanderous or say something that you do not mean.

    Make a decision that every word that comes from your mouth will be that of encouragement. It will not always go right but it is just the right thing to do.

    The magic word to use when you realise that you are wrong is I’m sorry, and please say it unconditionally.

    Conclusion

    Character is what defines a person. Change your ways and be of good character. There are many young people out there who need to be molded into young men and women with the character that can help change the world.

  • How to Enjoy the Journey of Your Life

    A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step in the right direction. Do not be discouraged by what you do not have. Your life’s journey is about to begin.

    “It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.” Ursula Le Guin.

    Today you begin to chart the course for the rest of your life. Forget about what you did not accomplish or achieve yesterday.

    What you do not have, should give you the motivation to move your life from where you are to where you want it to be. From The state of stagnation to a state of accomplishment.

    What you do not have, you cannot lose. The most important possessions you have right now are your life and your health. These are the two most important things you should worry about. Ensure you protect them at all costs.

    Many of us are living a life that we are not happy with. This should not discourage any of us from aiming to achieve more with our lives.

    You need to start from somewhere. You need to start from where you are. What lies ahead is more than what you have left behind.

    Your current situation or circumstances should instead give you motivation for working even harder to better your life. It will not be easy, but it can be done and it has been done before.

    Your source of encouragement should be, if someone has done it before then you can do it even better by learning from them because you are not reinventing the will but working with a proven method.

    Start From Where You Are

    Do not despise the days of your humble beginnings. Start with what you have and from where you are.

    Be dedicated to your cause and give it all you have. Regardless of what amount of resources you have, just get started. Along the way, you will learn to build more resources.

    Take stock of your current possessions, especially your personal skills set. You will be amazed to learn that you have far more than you thought you had. Your human capital is more than adequate to get you started.

    God has given all of us, unique talents to enable us to do something worthwhile with our lives. If only you can unlock them they are the gateway to a better and more fulfilling life for you. Life is much easier when you are doing what you love.

    If you have been waiting for the right moment to start,  today is that moment. It is the right time to take that leap of faith and move into the unknown.

    Today is the day you will look back with pride and appreciate that you took decisive action and stepped into the unknown.

    Your journey to conquer your fears and experience life begins with the step you are taking.

    Have courage and faith that you will enjoy your journey. Yes, there will be rough patches here and there, but with God by your side, you will triumph.

    Make Everyday Count

    Every day of your life is a blessing, make it count. You are the master of your soul. No one on this earth will make you happier than yourself.

    You are most happier when you are doing the things that you love doing. Time seems to stop when you are enjoying what you do.

    Enjoy these moments and make sure you do more of them very often. Life is too short to be sad. Make every day a special one.

    Not everything will go accordingly but decide to be happy regardless of the situation.

    You owe it to yourself to live a happy and fulfilling life. You are special in the eyes of God. Do not let anyone take that away from you.

    No one has the right to dictate or influence your current situation without your permission. Not even your spouse, your boyfriend, or whoever, they have absolutely no right without your permission.

    You cannot give an excuse that it was so and so who led me to do Something wrong. I find these excuses childish.

    If you are in the wrong place it is your choice. You can either stay or move, the choice is yours to make. But make sure to make the right choice.

    The best way we can contribute positively to humanity is by ensuring that our own lives are a reflection of what we want. If we profess Christianity people must see Christ living in us.

    We must be the change we want to see in the world. That change begins with you and I changing the way we think, the way we do things, and the way we treat others.

    Take Charge of Your Life

    You are responsible for your life. No one is answerable for your life. It is your right. If you think someone will give an account for you, then you are mistaken.

    Nature demands that each and every one of us account for our conduct. It also demands that we do the right things. I know that it is in our nature to do the right things.

    I also know that we have a tendency to do otherwise. God help us.

    Your life is in your hands. You are responsible for making sure that you account for it and make meaningful contributions to humanity. It is your duty to make the world a better place than you found it.

    Celebrate Your Small Achievements

    As you take on the journey of life, remember to always celebrate the small achievements you make. This will ensure that you stay motivated and keep on pushing.

    Success is made of the small achievements that we make along the way. These are the ones that motivate and inspire people to even do more.

    As you pursue and walk the journey of your life, enjoy your current moments and celebrate them with your loved ones.

    Conclusion

    Life is indeed a journey. You start off with people and as the journey progresses people disembark on different destinations. Still, the train of life continues to deliver people to various destinations. Make sure you make that first step in the right direction and never look back.

  • 2 Reasons Why You Are Responsible For Your Life

    “I am the captain of my soul. I am the master of my fate” – William Henley. If you didn’t know, now you know that you are solely responsible for your life. The choices and decisions you make are your responsibility.

    Stop blaming other people for your under achievements and take responsibility to correct them. Humans have a tendency of playing the blame game. We want to have an excuse for our failures and inadequacies.

    Most of the time we want to find someone or something to blame when things are not going right.

    But do you realise that most of the time, if not all time we are responsible for the outcome of our decisions?

    If you make poor or bad choices do you expect to have good or better results? Why then do you want to blame other people for your choices?

    This lack of being in control of our lives has cost many of us opportunities for growth.

    Look if I had been in total control of my life from a young age I know for sure that I could have achieved many things. Am pretty sure you can relate to this as well.

    However, the fact that I have not progressed as desired does not preclude me from being accountable for my life. It is my responsibility to ensure that I achieve and attain my God given destiny.

    I know for sure that we all want to live a good and pleasant. But, every good thing comes with a price.

    For you to live a good life you must first take responsibility and be prepared to pay the price and usually it is a very high one.

    Sometimes the small things we do may seem to be insignificant. Well you are wrong, success is doing the small things that need to be done and when added up they become significant.

    Being responsible makes you feel at peace with yourself. As human beings we do not like being associated with negative results. But remember that it is the movement from negative to positive that determines the level of your success.

    Personal development and self-improvement starts from being responsible for your life. When you are in control of your life it is much easier to chart the course for your life.

    Yes, things will not always go accordingly, but you will learn to handle disappointments more maturely and improve on your weaknesses.

    The Need to Be Accountable

    “Some men have thousands of reasons why they cannot do what they want to; all they need is one reason why they can” – Willis Whitney.

    “A desire to be in charge of our own lives, and a need for control is born in each of  us. It is essential to our mental health, and our success, that we take control” – Robert F. Bennett.

    When I was growing up I had no sense of accountability. For me life was just about enjoying myself and nothing else. But slowly as I approached my teens and advanced in my education things started to change.

    The demand from my Dad to perform better and keep up with school work, made me realise that I needed to be accountable for my life. At least then, it was out of fear of being reprimanded by my Dad.

    I thank God and give a lot of credit to my late Dad for the role he played in making me realise that I needed to be accountable for my life not only to myself but to him as well. This was a game-changer for my life.

    Being able to be accountable made me realise that I also needed to be in charge of my life. Because you will not be able to give a positive account if you do not know what you are doing. I think being accountable makes you responsible.

    Fast forward, am no longer accountable to my Dad but I have a wife and children that look up to me. Apart from God and society at large these are the people that am directly accountable to.

    You see because I now have my own family and they depend on me, I have learned that my life is not just about me. It is also about them. I need to strike a balance between my needs and also meet their needs.

    So far they have been very supportive of my work and I really thank them. But I do not take it for granted.

    Being accountable to someone makes you grow as an individual. It also helps you measure the level of your growth. If you do not have someone you are answerable to, it takes a lot of discipline to stay focused.

    I encourage you to find someone you can be answerable to. I know that the temptation especially for us men to wanting freedom is greater, but if you want to have better control of your life you need to have someone who can help you be in check.

    One Day You Will Be Answerable

    “Your talent is God’s gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God” – Leo Buscaglia.

    I believe in God and the resurrection and that we were all created by him. I also believe that there is a heaven and hell somewhere.

    The one who gives us life on a daily basis will one day demand an explanation of how we lived our lives on earth.

    We will be answerable to him, that is why we must try as much as possible to live according to his word.

    I have developed a never give up mentality because for every day that I wake up, I believe that God still has use for me.

    Oh yes, I know that some things have eluded me, but I also believe that there are much better opportunities to come for me.

    Always look to the brighter side of life. Stop complaining about going through the darkest side of life. If not you, then who?

    Get on and do the right thing bearing in mind that one day you will be answerable to your creator.

    Conclusion

    Life is too short. Focus from this day forward on making a difference. It is your responsibility to ensure that you attain your God-given destiny.

    With each choice you make, you create your life. Choose wisely and above all be responsible for your life.

  • Celebrating Your Small Achievements Can Increase Productivity

    Everything starts small. Rome was not built in one day. You do not start climbing a tree from the top. A journey of a thousand miles starts with one step. You cannot start running before you learn how to walk.

    The bible says do not despise the days of your humble beginnings. Instead of shunning them, learn to celebrate your small achievements. It is from the small achievements that personal development is achieved.

    If you want to achieve real growth you must start with the little that you possess. You should never cut corners on your quest for success. Life has a way of making you pay heavily for your misdeeds. It is much easier to measure growth when you start with little.

    Surely we all have something we can start with. At this age, we all possess something valuable that no one has. I know that most of the time we want to start from a comfortable point. But, if you are comfortable the chances to pursue personal development and self-improvement are very minimal.

    We are mostly driven by what we lack and not what we have. What you have achieved and accomplished should be a stepping stone for higher accomplishments.

    They say lack creates innovation. This is true because at the point when you are in a state of hardship you will come up with a solution.

    You are the Captain of Your Life

    How far you go in life is determined by how far you are willing to go. If you want to achieve greatness you can achieve it if you are willing to put in the effort and endurance.

    However, most of us do not realise that we have the ability to achieve many things and that all depends on how willing we are to push ourselves. Personal growth is not an easy task; it takes a lot of time and discipline to achieve and it is a lifelong journey.

    There will never be a time when you will say that now I have arrived. We are continually learning and growing as human beings.

    If you want to grow, be prepared to travel the narrow road. I call it narrow because you will need to sacrifice many pleasures and defer gratification. You may lose some relationships. But if that is necessary for you, well just do it anyway.

    At the end of the day, it is your life and you are responsible for it. No one should tell you what to do with it. Take one step at a time. Savour and enjoy every step and every moment. Even when things are not going your way, enjoy the moments. They come but once in a lifetime.

    Start Small and Grow

    Starting small is key. You start with what you have and where you are. Do not wait for conditions to be perfect, just start. There will never be a time when conditions are perfect. Now is the right time for you to start.

    Starting small gives you the opportunity to learn on the job and grow as an individual. Starting small prepares you for greater things to come. If you can succeed with small things then you are more likely to do better with even more.

    The Lord will bless you according to your capabilities and capacity. He is such a good father that he will never give you something that you cannot handle.

    As you start small and grow, you slowly begin to release your potential as you learn the ropes. This also allows you to not be overwhelmed with what you can handle effectively.

    If it’s a business you venture into, you will soon realise that the business will outgrow your individual capability and you will soon need more hands to help you.

    Life is like running a business. Dr. Myles Monroe said life is a business just like marriage is also a business.

    The small things you do every day add up to your greater achievements. You are a sum total of the small little things you do every day.

    Embrace Change

    Positive change is positive growth. Remember not all change is positive. When you decide to make the change, then you are on your way to growth. You begin to experience growth almost immediately.

    However, you will not achieve your full potential in an instant. It takes time to have meaningful and reasonable growth. They say all good things come with time. There is nothing worthwhile that comes without sweat. If it is good it is worth waiting for.

    If you want to achieve more with your life, learn to embrace positive change. Be the carrier of the change you want to be. Let’s be honest, if you really want to move forward with your life, you just need to change the way you live your life.

    You cannot expect different results by doing the same things. Sometimes all it takes is just a little effort to make the change that will have an everlasting impression on your life.

    Like I have said before, we live in an ever-changing world. If you do not change your ways, life will leave you behind. You will be extinct.

    Surely you do not want to be extinct while you are alive, do you? After all, we all want to be remembered fondly even in our death.

    But this can only be achieved if we make the decision to make positive change that will affect not only us but contribute to the world at large. I believe that we can all contribute positively in our own small way.

    Exercise Patience

    As you celebrate your small achievements you need to have a heart of patience. They say speed kills.

    Do not put unnecessary pressure on yourself. Yes, it is good to be focused but do not pressure yourself. You are not in a competition neither are you racing with anyone.

    Concentrate on living your life and not someone else’s life. Be in complete control of your life and you will be happy. Having control of your life is a great source of happiness.

    All good things come to those who wait patiently. Patience is a virtue. Do not cut corners so as to arrive quickly. You may end up crashing before your destination.

    I believe that being patient is not a sign of weakness but rather a sign of strength as being impatient can lead to wrong decisions.

    Conclusion

    Starting small is a sign of humbleness. If you read the history of successful people most of them started with nothing. They started with zero and went on to be very successful.

  • The 4 Keys to Success

    Everyone wants to achieve personal success. Every one of us wants to learn the ropes of being successful. We all have one common goal in life. To be successful and live a happy and fulfilling life.

    We all have a desire to make a difference in the world. But many of us struggle to triumph and live a below-average life style.

    Many have read on the subject of personal success. Many, if not all are students of the subject. Only a few are good students and are successful. While many fall in the category of bad students and are struggling.

    It is almost impossible to understand the subject of success in one attempt. However, in all the books I have come across, there are similarities. The presentations and presenters, may be different but most of them have similar themes and methods of achieving success.

    There are basically 4 keys that you need to help you achieve your success and these are:-

    Write Down Your Goals

    Without writing down your own goals, you will be shooting in the air; you will just be drifting and moving along aimlessly; you will be at the bottom of the park which is crowded. To have meaningful success you need to write down your goals and start working on them.

    This is the only way to measure your success. Your written down goals have to be measurable and specific. I like to personalise them by saying “I earn so much by such a date; I have done this by such a date.”

    You are the only person that can use the “I” for yourself. No one else can use it on you. Making such pronouncements helps to immediately know the exact target and the expected results. It also sets a deadline. Being exact with the goal gives motivation every time you read it.

    Since the goals are measurable, if, by the set date, I have not achieved the target, I simply adjust the date accordingly. However, I do not adjust the goal because by then my mind is already conditioned and working to achieve the set goal.

    Remember that the goals you set must be those that are in tandem with your overall life’s objectives. They must help you get closer to achieving your life’s intended purpose.

    Do not underestimate the power of writing down your goals. I usually carry around a notebook with me. Where I write down ideas and many other personal things. Don’t just rely on your memory, write down your goals.

    Set a Deadline

    Everything in life has a useful shelf life. Some things have a much longer useful shelf life than others. That is why deadlines are important. They make you work extra hard. We are always working to beat deadlines because we all know that time waits for no one.

    Setting reasonable deadlines is also key to ensuring that you achieve your success. Reasonable deadlines are those that give you ample time to be creative, work, and stay motivated. I have found that short deadlines can be a source of frustration especially if the goals are not achieved.

    Everyone has an optimum point when they give in their best. This is the time when you are full of energy and enthusiastic for life. The time when you can take on any challenge without much of a problem. This is the best time to ensure that you work extra hard to do the right things.

    If you are relatively younger this is the best time to ensure that you put your act together. Stop fooling around. Get to work and you will enjoy the benefits later. I know that a day will come when those energy levels will be a thing of the past. Ask those who are well advanced in age and they will tell you.

    The way I set my goals is that they include a deadline in the goal itself so am always in the know if am working beyond my expected deadline date. The thing with having deadlines is that your mind is tuned in and expectant to achieve a result at the set time.

    I have noticed that somehow your mind is constantly alert to your deadline and this keeps you working towards achieving or beating the set deadline.

    Take Action

    They say actions speak louder than words. Yes, it is important to set goals and having deadlines. But, setting goals and having deadlines will not achieve anything if you do not take action. Most of our plans die a natural death because we do not act on them. Taking action will ensure that you start moving towards your goals.

    Create a habit of taking action that will help you achieve your goals on a daily basis. Take one step at a time. If your goal is to make say US$200,000 by say 31 December, decide how you are going to make this money and get started with the process.

    We have a habit of just making good pronouncements and leaving everything to God. Look, God is not going to make you rich without you playing your part. God will open an opportunity for you and it is entirely up to you to cease it and make good use of it.

    You have a big part to play in God’s picture. I have noticed a tendency, especially amongst us Christians of saying “I receive in Jesus’ name” when a preacher makes certain pronouncements and we leave it at that.

    Yes, receive it and start working on actualising the pronouncement by taking action. Get up and go to work. The bible says “the Lord will bless the work of your hands.” Those who succeed are those who try and take action. It is better to die trying.

    Persist Until You Succeed

    Success does not come easy and does not come cheap. If it were easy, then we would all have been successful. There would have been no need to talk about it. But we talk about it because we know the challenges that people will face on the path to success.

    Yes, things will not always go according to your plan, and most of the time they never, but when you persist you will triumph over any challenge. Persistence is key to your success. Those who are successful are those who are resilient and persistent. They know that challenges have to be conquered.

    Without persistence, you are surely doomed to fail. Because along the way to success you will be met with many of them. Some of these challenges may look to be insurmountable. Your success will be largely determined by your persistence.

    The bigger your goals are the more hard work and persistence you need to have. Be prepared that on your journey to success you will be greatly tested. You will need to focus on the things that you have an influence on, as these are the things that will help you overcome your challenges.

    Conclusion

    “Successful people tend to become more successful because they are always thinking about their successes” – Brian Tracy.

    There are many ways to succeed but the above are key for me and they seem to work so far. You can devise what works for you but I reckon that they will not be very different from mine. We are all wired to succeed and the ball is in our hands.

  • The Darkest Hour is Just Before Dawn

    “Believe in a hope that a new hope is dawning, believe that your dreams will come true, believe in the promise of brighter tomorrows, begin by believing in you.”

    The darkest hour is just before dawn. Have you ever noticed that when you are about to break through there is usually a dark period that you experience?

    Perhaps the roughest patch is actually just before you hit the gold; just before you break through. This is also the period at which many of us, give up.

    Before the light of dawn, darkness may linger. Though we may face challenges and sorrow during the night, remember that joy and new beginnings await us in the morning. Embrace hope and keep moving forward, for brighter days are just ahead.

    If you are going through a very difficult patch in your life this I believe is a sign that good things are yet to come. This though does not mean that you stop working hard but instead it is time for you to doubled your efforts.

    I have come to realise that every time I start working on a new project, there is a period when things seem not to be making sense or going my way.

    There is always a time when I feel that everything I try is not just working out. I feel a negative force pulling me the other way.

    When I started developing this website I gave up for some time because things seemed not to be working out for me.

    This is when I did not even know how to promote my blog site and was receiving very little to no traffic. Perhaps that was the darkest time for this site.

    When you are in your darkest period and continuously work hard and smart, the dawn will surely come.

    Do not give up in this period of darkness, it is when you should work even harder to learn from your mistakes and ensure that when it is dawn you can reap the rewards and continue to enjoy them for a long time.

    Every Good Thing is Worth the Effort

    Every good thing is worth your best effort and time investment. If you are to build something of value you will definitely have to invest a lot of your time and energy.

    I have set myself targets for this site and this is always on my mind to ensure that my readers get what I feel is the best of me. My aim for this site is to give out enough and well written articles.

    I am always looking to write content on a regular basis as this is the only way to add value to this site. Currently, there are close to a hundred articles all written by me and of fairly good value.

    I must say that the traffic is currently improving and will surely reach the intended targets within a short period of time.

    In a few month’s time this site will be of great value to my readers and contribute to personal development and self-growth topics.

    One of the targets I have set for the next 12 months is to read a minimum of 12 personal development and self-growth books, this is in addition to my regular reading. This translates to a minimum of 1 book per month. Surely this is achievable.

    The journey of success is not an easy one but is very enjoyable. I can say am still in the darkest of hours it is not yet dawn for me and my intended life’s purpose. The good thing is I have started off, am no longer in my comfort zone.

    Just Get Started and Stay on it

    If you have been thinking or have a written down life’s purpose just get started with it. Even if it is not yet very clear, just get started.

    Sometimes we over plan to the extent that our plans begin to scare us and eventually are overtaken by events and we end up not even getting started.

    There are some plans that I have shelved because they have been overtaken by events. Yes, it’s good to plan but please do not over plan.

    You may adjust your plans as you go along and have a much clearer picture of what you want to achieve. Yes, it is very important to have a plan but also remember that time waits for nobody.

    With time, patience, and perseverance you will accomplish all things. You should learn to strike a balance between your planning phase and your implementation process they are both important.

    “In the marathon of life, success calls for dedication to the goal, perseverance, compassion for my fellow man, and faith in God” – John A. Kelley.

    In the field of personal development and self-improvement, it is very important that you get started with your plans and adjust them as you go along.

    You will agree with me that the same, is equally true with business plans. Normally the reality tends to be very different from the plan.

    Only when you get started will you realise that some of the things you had planned for, might need to be adjusted to reality.

    I personally see nothing wrong with adjusting your plans to conform with what is obtaining on the ground. However, don’t change your final destination.

    We are mostly discouraged when our plans are not matching with reality. This is when you realise that you have reached the darkest of hours. At this point in your life, you need to steady your ship and weather the storm.

    At the end of the storm is calmness and it will surely be dawn. I Know that every project does go through storms and therefore, it is very important that you, the captain of the ship remain very focused to navigate through the storm.

    If you give up you might just be a few metres away from your breakthrough.

    Learn From Your Mistakes and Make Adjustments

    It is very important to learn from your mistakes and make the necessary adjustments,  in order for you to shorten your darkest hours.

    Most of the time your darkest hours are a result of your mistakes. Sometimes the dawn is delayed for reasons not known to us but, this should not make us despair for as long as we are sure that we are doing the right things.

    Mistakes will always be there and are made by everyone including the most disciplined and successful people.

    The difference, however, is how you recover from your mishaps. Always keep in mind that personal growth is not a competition neither is it a race with anyone. My personal development path is very different from yours.

    Life will always throw challenges at us and hence we are prone to make mistakes as we navigate through it. Learn to analyse your failures and refuse to accept them.

    Your mistakes are just one way of telling you to do things differently. With perseverance and persistence, your dawn will surely be upon you for a long time to come.

    So far my personal growth journey has been a fairly enjoyable one. I keep praying to God that he continues to guide me on this path I have set myself on.

    “Through perseverance, many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure” -Benjamin Disraeli

    Conclusion

    “I don’t think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature” – John D. Rockefeller.

    Remember that personal development is not a destination but a journey. The darkest hours of your journey are just before dawn.

    Never give up on your dream and keep on making adjustments until you succeed. Remember that every good thing is worth your time and effort.

  • The Power to Make Choices is In Your Hands

    We live our lives based of the choices and decisions we make every day. The choices and decisions we make largely determine the quality of the lives we live.

    If you choose to be happy, you will live a happy life; if you choose to be negative you will be negative, so whatever you decide to do, the choice is yours.

    You are currently in this situation largely because of the choices you have previously made. You are living your choice. Stop blaming others and do something to change it.

    You are totally responsible for the decisions you make. God gave us the ability to make our own decisions. We are expected to be responsible for the decisions we make and endure the consequences.

    Unfortunately, many of us live in denial of being responsible for the state of our lives. We always want to blame someone for not being supportive or doing something about it.

    How do you expect someone to do something about your situation when you made the wrong decision? You made the wrong choice. Look, God allows certain things to happen to us in order that we may learn from them. Experience is a good teacher.

    Most of the time we neglect the good counsel we are given. When people come with good advice we are quick to ignore or even rebuke them. “I know what am doing. It’s my life after all.” These are some of the most common answers we give.

    People always want to give an excuse when they fail. We cry and complain to say “why me” O Lord. But, let’s face it, if not “you” then who? We only want to be credited with the positive things we do.

    The same energy you apply when things are going right should be applied even in your trying times. In fact, you must double that energy during your trying times.

    The Blame game will not change your current situation it will only make things worse. If you are facing difficulties in your marriage go and seek professional help, make the decision and quit complaining about your spouse.

    If it’s financing you want, start a side hustle, no matter how small it may be, learn the ropes and get busy with it. At least get started. Yes, you will fail but one day you will look back and say I have come from very far.

    Life has taught me that, to make meaningful progress, you need to realise that you are totally responsible for your choices and the decisions you make. This will help you make better decisions and take corrective action where necessary.

    Taking responsibility may sound harsh but, that is just the reality of life. If you are not happy with your current lifestyle, it is your duty and responsibility to change the situation. You have the power within, to make the right choices.

    If you wait for someone to come and change it for you, most likely you will wait forever. No one will pitch up for you.

    Look no one has the right to force you to go against your free will without your permission. You are made of the things you do and not the things that happen to you. You will stumble, every now and again that’s life but stumbling is not what makes you.

    What makes you is that which makes you stand up when you stumble. Just because your friends have invited you to attend a party does not mean you should attend. You have a choice either to attend or not.

    If you have a goal to achieve stay home and work on it. True friends will always support your endeavours. Surely there will be more parties to attend when you succeed.

    Create Personal Boundaries and Take Responsibility

    Humans by nature are social beings. This means that we are tolerant of other beings. We want to have a sense of belonging. That is why family and friendships are important. We want to have a safety net. A place where we feel safe.

    Most of the time especially in our teens we are easily influenced by our peers and join in everything we think is cool just to fit in a certain group.

    This leads us to lose our personal boundaries and allows people to control our lives. I remember being in the same dilemma for a long time. I know that many of us have experienced peer pressure at some point.

    When you allow people to cross your personal boundaries you lose yourself. You lose your personal Identity.

    That is why it is important to maintain and guard your personal space it is your property. It is your responsibility to ensure that you are in charge of your boundaries.

    It is difficult to re-create boundaries especially when you have lost them, but it is worth fighting for. Do not let other people be responsible for your well-being. Let your “No” be “No” and your “Yes” be “Yes” nothing less nothing more.

    Sometimes we lose our boundaries by being over-responsible for other people’s needs especially our children. We want to be involved in everything they do and take responsibility for them. We want to be responsible for their happiness, success, and their life in general.

    Well, in as much as we have to be involved in the many aspects of their lives, especially when they are still young, we have to have a limit. They are individual human beings and at some point in life, they will have to move on. You do not want to have a 25 years old baby in your house.

    Depending on how old they are, allow them to make certain choices and let them take responsibility for their actions. When my eldest son was about 5 years I had trained him in such a way that we could go shopping and he would not through tantrums crying for toys.

    When it was time to buy toys I would take him to a toy shop and tell him to choose 1 or 2 toys. The funny part is that even as a small boy he would start negotiating with me to get him more toys because 1 or 2 were just not enough.

    I would stick to the agreed number and that the choice is entirely his to make. Of course, I would chip in to advise but I allowed him to make the final decision.

    The catch was to make him own the toys and be responsible for them. This way every time the toys stopped working and he comes crying, I would tell him it was his choice. Eventually, I noticed that he would take my advice most of the time. Now he is a big boy.

    Exercise Your Power Wisely

    The ability to choose and make your own decisions is powerful. It should not be taken lightly. This power is uniquely yours and never allow anyone to get it away from you.

    Be in control of your life by making wise informed decisions. To live a happy life, you need to learn how to make decisions and choices that are beneficial in both the short and long run. Be in control of your life by choosing what you do every day.

    When you are faced with difficult challenges in life take a break and don’t make hasty decisions. Think about how you will be affected in the medium to long term; think about the impact your decision will have on your immediate family.

    If possible consult your spouse and children, let them have an input after all we spend most of the time working for them.

    Listen to their concerns and fears. But ultimately you will have to make that decision bearing in mind the information you have gathered from your immediate family.

    Personal development and self-improvement demands that you are responsible for the decisions and choices you make.

    Conclusion

    You have the power and ability to make your own choices and decisions that will affect or change your life. Let no one take away that power and responsibility from you. Make those decisions and choices today and kick start your life.

  • Learn to Keep Your Dreams Alive

    The key to happiness is having dreams. The key to success is making your dreams come true.

    We all have dreams, but life can be a discouragement. Life has a way of pushing our dreams backwards.

    We all have gone through a rough patch in our lives and this may have resulted in you burying your dreams. There are various reasons why your dreams could be buried. 

    Some dreams are buried under bad health; some are buried under divorce and still, most people are buried with their dreams. Dr. Myles Monroe says the richest place on earth is the cemetery.

    This is where you find songs that have never been sung; books that have never been written; paintings that have never been painted; businesses that have never been actualised; buildings that have never been built and many other dreams that will never be realised.

    Even though your dreams have been buried, for as long as you still have the breath of life they are still alive, God has not forgotten about them. Your dreams may be buried but they are not dead.

    Most of us are discouraged when we are met with temporal adversity. But do you realise that obstacles are part of the bigger picture to help you achieve your dreams?

    The adversities we face are part of the process we go through to actualise our dreams. The many obstacles that you will encounter are part of the journey to achieving your dreams.

    Success is born from the challenges we face. Each obstacle you encounter is a stepping stone on your journey to greatness. Embrace these hurdles, for they are the true measures of your strength and resilience. Every struggle you overcome brings you closer to your goals. Keep pushing forward; your perseverance will pave the way to success.

    The fact that you have dreams does not necessarily mean that they will be achieved without hard work and persistence.

    Yes, it’s very important and necessary to have dreams but that does not guarantee that you will not come across challenges. Life is full of challenges and these are meant to prepare you and take you to the next level.

    It is never too late to realise your dreams. It does not matter how old you are if you awaken the dreams that God put on your heart you will surely achieve them.

    The bible says I will restore the years that the locust has eaten”. God has a way of giving us back our lost time.

    Do not die with your dreams, but allow God Almighty to help you share your dreams with the world.

    When God created you, he put in you all the gifts and talents needed to overcome any adversity and obstacle that you may encounter on your way to achieving your goals.

    He put in you the ability to change adversity into diversity; the ability to overcome obstacles.

    Write Down Your Dreams

    We must keep a hard copy of our dreams. Most successful people have written down their dreams.

    Read goals and goal setting for more details. There is a saying that when you write down your dreams when people read them, they will most likely follow them and this will eventually help you realise them even more quickly.

    Writing down your dreams also acts as a constant reminder. Every so often it is important to refer back to them and constantly remind yourself of what you want to achieve.

    It is not easy to commit to something you that is not written down because you will not fully recall it after some time.

    Regularly review your progress and make improvements. This can only be done if you have written them down.

    I have developed a habit of writing down what I want to achieve. Every year I make resolutions and set out goals to be achieved.

    I make sure that they conform to the bigger picture of what my life’s intended purpose is.

    Life is becoming more bearable for me as each day I focus on what I want to achieve. Yes, sometimes I find myself fire fighting. But I always try as much as possible to learn from fire fighting instances.

    Sometimes you may feel that there are too many setbacks, but do you realise that those same “setbacks” are “setups” to achieving your dreams?

    They propel you to see beyond the current circumstances. In every bad situation, there is always something positive.

    You may not understand it but I think God does not allow us go through the storm alone. He always provides a way where there seems to be no way. 

    God is always with us and he is always providing guidance. The current that determine our dreams and shapes our lives, flow from the attitude that we nurture every day.

    Speak Life to Every Dead Situation

    There is power in your tongue. What you say usually comes to pass. Remember that even during creation the Bible tells us in Genesis that every time God spoke: “it came to be”.

    For example on the first day of creation God said “let there be light” and here we are today, we have light throughout the day.

    All through creation we are told God said whatever he wanted to see and that is what came out and was created.

    To me, this demonstrates the power that the tongue holds. We are in our current situations mostly because of what we hold as thoughts and what we have said in the past.

    In other words, we have created our situations knowingly or unknowingly.

    If you go about complaining about how hard the economy is and how things are not working out for you, that is exactly what will come to pass in your life.

    Have you noticed that when economists predict a rise in inflation or commodity prices that is exactly what happens around the world? And the opposite is also true.

    This is equally true even with us on an individual level. When we speak positively about our life things begin to change.

    Therefore, it is important that you learn to always speak positive words of encouragement when faced with negative situations.

    One source of encouragement is the Bible. God has promised us so many good things even when we are faced with adversities.

    If you are sick, begin to claim your healing because the bible promises us good health and long life. “With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation” – the Bible.

    It may take time but every time you speak healing to your body you unbury your dreams of being healthy again.

    Begin to see yourself walking and living your dreams because God promised it. Speak positive affirmations to all negative situations in your life.

    Yes, you may be struggling financially but remember that God promised that he shall supply all your needs according to his riches in glory. Not some, but all of them.

    Trust in God

    “Because he loves me, says the Lord, I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name” – the Bible.

    At the end of the day, we are all created by God in his image and likeness. Whether we like it or not the Bible tells us in Genesis, that we are all created in Gods image.

    It’s like when we buy an appliance, the first thing we do is read the user’s manual and understand how the new appliance works and what its limitations are.

    The mere fact that we take time to read what the manufacturer’s manual says, we are placing our trust in the manufacturer because they are the creators of that appliance.

    We are acknowledging that the manufacturer knows the appliance better than us and gives us instructions on how to use it.

    It’s the same with us as human beings. If we live trusting God he surely does not let us down. Yes, sometimes things may not go as we want them, but God Almighty knows what’s best for us.

    All things work out for the better if we put your trust in God. Over the years I have learned to trust God. There are times when I feel that he is far away from me but my plans are not his.

    I know for sure that he has much much better plans for my life than I can imagine. I try as much as possible to live my life according to his plans. 

    The fact that am still alive is testimony enough that God cares about me. You may not realise it but we all have many things to thank God for.

    If it’s wealth, I believe that this world has more than enough to go round for all the 6 billion + inhabitants.

    Most of the time we find ourselves on the wrong end because we ignore what God is telling us, and usually, this is done out of selfish motives.

    There is a time I learned the hard way. I was trying to grow some tomatoes on a large scale for sale.

    God had clearly told me to do my own seedlings, this would have meant that I plant the seeds and wait for at least a month or so before transplanting them, but instead, I decided to go and buy the seedlings. I was trying to cut down on waiting time.

    They started very well and I thought you see I could have wasted time. My my my I lost everything after putting in so much effort and wasting money on fertilisers and chemicals.

    By the time I decided to do what God had earlier told me, it was too late and the rains were upon us. I guess God was trying to guide me to work within his plans.

    Conclusion

    “We should show our lives not as it is or how it ought to be, but only as we see it in our dreams” – Count Leo Tolstoy.

    I believe that every reasonable human being has a dream, in fact, many dreams.

    The difference between successful people and average people is that successful people have kept their dreams alive and are seriously perusing them.

    If you are reading this article I know that you have dreams, it is my prayer and hope that you will ask God to not allow you to go to the grave without realising them.

  • Building Strong Relationships and the Importance of Reciprocity

    Reciprocity is the relation of mutual dependence or action or influence. Humans are well known for being social. Being in a relationship, be it intimate, social, or business requires the reciprocity of the people involved. All human beings excel in relationships where both parties have a balanced, give and take situation.

    Relationships, where reciprocity is not practised, are usually strained. They are one-sided and problematic. When there is no reciprocity the relationship is on the rocks.

    To create reciprocity in a relationship, both parties need to take responsibility for that creation. It must be done with a deliberate intent for the relationship to work.

    Good healthy relationships are those that which people have mutual respect for one another and every member, does not feel that they are putting in much more than the other. If you want to live a happy life, it is important to be in a healthy relationship where reciprocity is practised.

    Some relationships are not beneficial for your personal development. If you are in a relationship that makes you uncomfortable, leave. Make the decision and set yourself free. You must weigh what benefits you are getting from being in certain relationships.

    If you have to break them please go ahead. This year I have resolved to evaluate most of my relationships. I have also resolved to work on improving those that I feel need to be improved. Over the years I have slowly broken out of some unhealthy relationships.

    I have managed to stay away from them, especially those that were not adding any value to my personal improvement. I liken relationships to the game of chess. If you play chess with players who are less skilled than you are, you do not improve. You are merely improving them whilst you remain stagnated.

    Building and Understanding Reciprocity

    The principle of reciprocity is also key and crucial to success in all business relationships. The strongest and longest-lasting interpersonal relationships are based on the principle of reciprocity, and this extends far into the best relationships between buyers and sellers.

    Therefore, it is important that we take time to build and understand this principle. Good solid relationships take time to build. When building them we must understand that every relationship is unique.

    A good example of how to build reciprocity in a relationship is to apply the principle of “do unto others what you would want them do unto you.” Believe me, it is the best bet. If you expect people to treat you with respect you must be the first to respect them.

    The flip side though is to do good and not expect anything in return. When you are expectant most of the time you will be disappointed because you are not in control of other people’s actions. You can only control your actions.

    Here are a few ways that can help you build long-lasting relationships:-

    • Be the First to Give Something – Try and be the first to give something. The bible says “it is more blessed to give than to receive.” When you give don’t expect anything in return. Regard it as a gesture of good will. If you are in business offer an incentive when the sale is complete. Send gifts to your clients as a way of thanking them for supporting your business.
    • Keep the Relationship Going – Good relationships are not easy to come by. We all want to have them, so keep the relationship going. Find ways that will help you grow it. I have noticed that some of the best relationships I have were built during my high school and college days. Yes, along the way I have built new ones but am more comfortable with my old buddies.
    • Offer to Support – Support is a form of giving. People always appreciate being supported. Don’t we all? I believe in the saying that “you never know who is going to keep you tomorrow.” Giving support is also a sign of generosity. Be generous.

    You Need to Give and Take

    In every relationship that you build you need to have a give and take attitude. You lose some and you win some. Relationships must be based on mutual respect and understanding. Good solid relationships are built on trust.

    Remember that trust is earned. Once breached it takes time to repair. When you are trusted with responsibility at work, for example, ensure you deliver. If you cannot deliver ensure that you communicate. It is better to be honest, that way you earn trust.

    Conclusion

    “Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship” – Buddha.

    To succeed we must build strong healthy and trustworthy, relationships with the people we come into contact with.

  • There is No Safety in the “Comfort Zone”

    Life requires that we move on while our human nature dictates that we remain in our “comfort zone.”

    Unfortunately, our comfort zone does not provide for growth. When you remain in your comfort zone chances are that you will never grow.

    You are most likely going to live a nonfulfilling life. If you have to contribute meaningfully to society, and to your own well-being, you have to move out of your comfort zone and explore the world.

    Explore the unknown and be bruised and battered to create your own safety zone. Those that make it in life are those that embrace challenges.

    Unfortunately, most of us do not embrace challenges. We would rather complain and do nothing about it. Complaining does not resolve anything.

    Most successful people have moved out of their comfort zone and are sailing the deep waters of the sea. They are enjoying the exploits of the sea called life.

    Whereas most of us are scared of exploring the unknown world. We would rather remain in our “comfort zone” which is not even comfortable when you come to think of it.

    We see our friends progress and are envious of them. I feel that it is rather unfair to the world that we demand to see change when we are doing nothing about it. If you want to see change be the change agent yourself.

    Change begins with you. It actually begins with a change of attitude in your thinking. Change the thoughts you habour.

    All growth is the sum total of the small things that we do and have accomplished on a daily basis. Human beings are like a ship.

    To know the strength of a ship it must leave the safe harbour and sail the deep waters. The ship must be able to withstand the stormy weather and sail back to the safe harbour.

    You are the captain of that ship. You must learn to navigate through life and overcome the obstacles that come your way.

    It is only by exploring the world around us that we discover many new and exciting things. I think that when God created us he designed us to explore and learn the world.

    If you want to grow in a certain area of your life, you need to leave your comfort zone and start exploring new ways to improve.

    Why Should We Explore the World?

    You will agree with me that life was meant to be enjoyed. You cannot enjoy life to the fullest by being in the same position or place.

    One of the best ways to derive satisfaction in life is by exploring the world around you. Many of us are even dead scared to move to new places.

    We would rather die in one place and not explore new places. I am one person that has always enjoyed traveling.

    It is through traveling that I discovered that there is more life out there than in the city.

    There is more natural beauty out there. God created us to be explorers of this world. There are more opportunities to be of service out there than where you are.

    I have discovered that the greatest joy one can derive from life is being of service to humanity.

    When people appreciate your work it gives you more joy and satisfaction. They say sharing is caring, that is why I share my stories throw this blog because I care.

    You know that it is very difficult to put up a building where there is already an existing structure. You will have to demolish it before you put up a new one; whereas it is very easy to build a new structure where there is no building.

    Many of us tend to gravitate towards crowded areas, believing that safety lies in numbers. However, true opportunity often awaits in less populated spaces. Embrace the chance to carve out your own path where others may hesitate. Building in uncharted territories can lead to greater rewards and unique advantages.

    No disrespect but I find cities to be crowded places. People are all fighting for very few or dwindling resources. I see buildings being erected where, some are being built where they are not supposed to be.

    The world is full of untapped resources. It is, therefore, our duty to explore and utilise these untapped resources.

    We are not doing ourselves a service by staying in one place and constantly fighting for the ever-dwindling resources when there are more places to be discovered and explored out there.

    I believe that God created more than enough resources to go around humanity.

    Imagine if David Livingstone did not have the courage to explore, he would not have known the existence of the Mighty Victoria Falls or if Christopher Columbus did not discover the Americas and many other explorers that risked their lives traveling around the world.

    We would have probably not known about the existence of the many discoveries they made.

    Take the Challenge and Leave the Comfort Zone

    This year I have set myself a target to conquer some of my fears like public speaking. Yes, you heard me right. Public speaking is one area most of us are scared of, especially me.

    My comfort zone has always been sitting in the background and let other people do the talking whilst I silently criticise.

    To overcome this fear I have started preparing myself both physically and mentally. I am gathering material that I think will help me.

    Am also already seeing myself as a very good public speaker. Not necessarily motivational speaking but to just speak in front of an audience and do it exceptionally well.

    I hope that come to the end of the year I shall be able to stand in front of an audience and speak on a given subject with confidence.

    You could also give yourself a challenge to overcome some of your fears. It could be the fear of starting a new business, the fear of relocating, and so on and so forth.

    Yes, you will be faced with many obstacles at the very beginning, but your success will be determined by the way to rise up when you fall.

    I always encourage myself by repeatedly saying I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me – Philippians. I also take comfort by knowing that if God is for us, who can be against us? – Romans. I have personalised the Romans quote by replacing “us” with “me.” I say if God is for me, who can be against me?

    I am not a perfect person am far from being one and would probably never be perfect. I have my own struggles many of them for that matter and have never been better than most of you.

    I still struggle with so many things in my life. Forgive me if at any point I portrayed myself as a perfect person, it was not and will never be my intention.

    I have lived most of my life with so many struggles however, in the last 10 years or so, there has been a drastic change in my life.

    I thank God almighty for giving me a second chance at life. Those that know me can attest to this. Am not blowing my own trumpet but just so that you can be encouraged from my own experiences.

    Grow Your Faith and Trust God

    “What seems impossible one minute, through faith, becomes possible the next” – Norman Vincent Peale.

    Let’s begin by defining faith. “Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see” – The Bible.

    I believe and trust in God almighty for all the things that I do and hope to achieve. I think it is important to grow our faith and believe that God will help us achieve our goals.

    There is a nice phrase that I learned from the power of positive thinking by Dr. Norman V. Peale and I encourage you to apply it on a daily basis “God is with me. God is helping me. God is guiding me.” When you start moving into deeper waters you will need a lot of encouragement.

    Always remember that God is on your side and is actually guiding you. Yes, you will stumble along the way, but if your trust is in God he will certainly show you the way when you call on him.

    Most of the time we remain in the safe harbour because we have no faith and we fear to fail. The more you grow your faith the more courage you gain.

    I guess there is a direct relationship between faith and courage. The only way to grow your faith is by reading and meditating on the word of God.

    Everyone who has ever succeeded has faith. They believe that they will achieve that which they have set out to accomplish even when they cannot see positive results instantly. Everything that is good is worth the effort.

    Conclusion

    “The first step is to fill your life with positive faith that will help you through anything. The second step is to start where you are” – Norman Vincent Peale.

    Being in your “comfort zone” will not help you grow. You cannot produce meaningful results in life if you are content with what you currently have.

    You must show and demonstrate the desire and the will to achieve.